Monday, July 05, 2004

Third stage of love for women: FAITH

faith- 1 a : allegiance to duty or a person : LOYALTY b (1) : fidelity to one's promises (2) : sincerity of intentions
2 a (1) : belief and trust in and loyalty to God (2) : belief in the traditional doctrines of a religion b (1) : firm belief in something for which there is no proof (2) : complete trust
3 : something that is believed especially with strong conviction; especially : a system of religious beliefs
synonym see BELIEF
- in faith : without doubt or question : VERILY

Well, well, well you have found the man of your dreams(or so you think) and you are in complete bliss. You are different then all those other women that are single and miserable. You have went through hell and have found a way to snag a good man out of the not so good men that have came and exited your life. The relationship you are in is in full swing and now love is your middle name. Happiness and comfort is so much around you that you now have a renewed sense of control and empowerment over your life. Now as a women you are making things happen and you even dedicate yourself wholeheartedly to the wants and needs of your significant other. THIS IS THE TIME OF YOUR LIFE AS A WOMAN THAT ALL THINGS ARE COMPLETE. You are extremely happy, BUT YOUR MAN ISN'T.

LADIES, if you are wondering when that exact point when your marriage went wrong, then you weren't aware of that stage of love when crisis is at its highest potential. That point when your man starts to question whether or not he should stay with you or not stay with you. This stage(CRISIS POINT) is most likely when you are the most happiest in the relationship but yet the least attentive to your man's needs. That's right, that breakup point or the inevitable divorce waiting to happen is caused by one thing. FAITH(or the lack of). As a man, one of our biggest concerns(FEAR) is that no matter what we get into or who we settle down with, we have to maintain that sense of freedom and degree of pride. Without that, ladies may find themselves with a brooding man that may not know how to release or express his emotions. A man with his freedoms trampled on and his pride(ego) bruised can turn out to be your worst nightmare. A sensible woman would ask well "how does that happen"? If I am extremely happy then it is no question that I am making my man happy! RIGHT?WRONG!

It is at this crucial stage of FAITH that women tend to change their man little by little. They begin to conduct complete makeovers. This is also when women STOP listening to men. Relationships are a constant exchange of power. It is a constant giving and taking between two individuals that may not always agree. In order to sustain some sort of equilibrium a man must learn to be aware of a women's constantly changing needs and a women at times has to learn to submit to a man's leadership. This is where things get sticky. A true test of FAITH for women is when there man suggests something or says that something should be done and the woman second guesses his decision. This is when disaster strikes. Your man shuts down and starts feeling like you don't respect him or what he says. Most men are pleased by their ability to lead and by how much their woman respects their decision making. If at any time you have doubt or question anything in a relationship then you are far from in love. You are more happy to be with a roommate then to be with someone that holds fidelity to ones own promises and vows. In a nutshell ladies you must know when to follow at the point in the relationship when you feel the most critical, the most opinionated and the most blissful. This doesn't mean be docile or a door mat. However, if you are consistently second guessing your man and regularly trying to train him and ignore his leadership, then you don't have a male companion or FAITH, you have a puppy. And if you would rather have a puppy then a man, don't be surprised when he BITES BACK.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

The reading was quite tranquil without pointing a finger and fonting more about emotions. I definitely went through stage three for almost three years none the less I enjoyed reading your 5stagesoflove and look forward to reading your book. I'll be posting more comments as I continue past stage3, right now I'm marinating on what I've read thus far,Peace!

Posted by youleftAmarkonme to 5stagesoflove at 7/10/2004 04:47:21 PM